March 13th - M Resort

This time of year in Las Vegas, the temperature flirts with the idea of giving way to sizzling summer heat. The sandals in my closet beckon me. The desire to frolic about town with shoulders and legs bared is overwhelming. I love the heat of Las Vegas. In spite of the arid daylight degrees sucking all of the moisture from my body and downright molesting my hair, I hungrily welcome the Las Vegas nights.

When sun gives way to moon and temps drop to a refreshing 90-something from a daytime high of 100-something, this 30-something rushes out to the nearest pool party, poolside concert, or patio gathering to let the night air swallow me right on up. Visiting the newly established M Resort at the southern most end of Las Vegas Blvd awakened the dormant summer girl in me. Specifically and shamelessly targeting adults aged 30-55, M Resort gives us the wonderful gift of Villaggio Del Sole Pool and Entertainment Piazza. Oh, it's something reminiscent of an Egyptian dream overlooking the expanse of the valley. I must have spent about fifteen minutes just walking around those pools imagining myself rocking out to a Gnarls Barkley concert while sipping a sweet cocktail. On Friday night however, the desert breeze was whipping around fiercely and so I made my way back inside thinking three words.... I'll be back.

Inside, the casino floor was bustling with activity. The place has just been open for a week, but their extensive ad campaign and big ass blimp floating around in the sky made it very difficult for curious locals to stay way. I'd heard that the casino was terribly understaffed and that was evident from the thirty minutes it took simply to place an order for my signature vodka martini with extra olives. No worries. I settled into a barstool at Ravello Lounge next to an older gentlemen named Charles who was visibly annoyed at the lounge entertainment. Totally blogworthy.

I guess from time to time, we locals tend to forget about the fabled Las Vegas lounge act. We're usually rushing through a casino to get to a Cirque Du Soleil show or a concert or a party. We tend to ignore the tourists drunkenly simulating dance in front of an ambiguously talented cover band. I firmly believe the only requirements for scoring a lounge gig is good looks and no fear. Alcohol consumptionm, on the part of the audience, totally takes care of the rest. Thus before me at the Ravello Lounge was a band that closely resembled The Brady Bunch, dressed in white, covering tunes made popular by Earth, Wind & Fire, Morris Day and The Time, and Rick James. Charles sat next to me rolling his eyes so hard I thought he was going to fall right out of his tool. He looked at the expression on my face believing me to mirror his feelings of the band sucking. Actually, I thought that the musicians played very well and I was wondering what I needed to do to petition one of these casinos to let me dance around on stage singing off key for four straight sets.

Charles was as a promoter of sorts. Hailing from Northern California, he had retired from a full time career of coordinating concerts and performances of the R&B and Soul persuasion. Now, as a four year Henderson resident, he was attempting to entice M Resort to have acts comparable to Tower of Power perform out on that luscious piazza. You see, Charles had successfully arranged for sold-out showings at such venues as Eastside Cannery and The Orleans and he was totally frustrated that M Resort would hear none of his ideas for entertainment. Charles felt the M Resort stood to lose out on a solid audience of 60+ year olds. He was sure that if his agemates came to hear The Brady Bunch, they would collect both their gambling dollars and their air tanks and promptly leave. Poor Charles.

I didn't want him to sit there growing increasingly upset especially after a collection of the target demo gathered in front of the stage to jeck back and forth to a cover of Sweet Home Alabama. As carefully as I could, I explained to Charles the difference between the crowd at Eastside Cannery and M Resort. They weren't discriminating against him or good entertainment. Rather, they were seeking a very specific audience not unlike that which frequents Red Rock Casino and Green Valley Ranch. I finished my martini and shook Charles's hand. I'm pretty sure he called me a few kinds of assholes as I walked away. Afterall, I had just rained on his Chi-Liting parade.

There was no reason to stay any longer. After slapping the drummer a hi-five, I made my way through the casino floor towards the parking lot. I love how casinos decorate with varying textures and patterns. Even when the place is devoid of bodies, it still manages to look alive. Perhaps, after I score a lounge-singing gig I can sit in on a few color scheme meetings for the next new resort.

February 24th - Spiked Lemonade @ Satay Malaysian Grill

OutPast30 Lady did venture out to a Spyonvegas event last night...but other than the free beer and the spicy sushi there wasn't much to chat about. However, my fellow 30-something gal pal went to a really cool event and I'm wondering the why the hell I wasn't there!

Spiked Lemonade .....What a refreshing change from the typical humdrum networking events in Las Vegas.

Last night was the first Spiked Lemonade event – a venue that allows Las Vegans an opportunity to rant, rave or talk about whatever is on their minds. Why “spiked lemonade?” Some people are tired of taking the lemons in their life and making plain lemonade. Sometimes a little extra spike is needed to truly make things in life seem a tad better.

The rules: Libations are a must. You get to rant about five issues (no political correctness necessary) and you must deposit a dollar to benefit the event’s charity of choice if you choose to speak. (Hint, hint, non profits.) I, along with twenty other Las Vegas professionals, took on the challenge and had a surprisingly great time for what could have turned into an awkward situation.

The brainchild of local networking and business extraordinaire Bessy Lee-Oh, Spiked Lemonade has a special purpose… to give people a chance to lay it all out on the table and then network afterwards. When you think about it, knowing a person’s personal frustrations and story brings you closer to them. And, in business, relationships are key. I left at 10 p.m. last night with five business cards in my pocket and a long list of “to email/follow-ups” in my purse for the next morning. Not too shabby when you can consider my time at Spiked Lemonade a part of a group therapy session for my life as well. A win-win situation does not even begin to give it justice.

The venue, SATAY Malaysian Grill on Paradise just off Flamingo, was perfect. (Try the deep fried garlic tofu.) Even the owner took part and said a few words. People off the street joined the group including a Virginia tech analyst in town for a convention. He ended up giving a rant of his own!

So what did I rant about , you ask? I can’t tell. You’ll need to attend the next event to hear – which is currently being planned as we speak. (Keep checking back on this blog for the next date.) Let’s just say that last night daddy issues, bad drivers, stimulus packages, in-laws, today’s youth, irresponsible friends and just about anything else you can imagine was put out into the public by all who were there. What a night.

Thanks, Ms. Amber! OutPast30 Lady's gonna have to get up on some of that ranting action. That's all I need... a drink and a mic. Hope there's not a time limit. LOLOLOLOL!

February 6th - PURE!!!

Okay, I just want to start off this post with a celebratory WOOOOOOOO!!!!

I got on quite splendidly during last night's outing. I'm particularly glad that last night was such a hit because I was having serious doubts about venturing out. It's rather tough being a childless, 30-something party addict. Originally, I had a crew of four other 30-something party addicts lined up to roll with me. One by one, they cancelled. No babysitter to be found. Tired from work. Too much drinking earlier on in the week. Outfit wasn't fitting right due to water retention. Good grief. The dilemma for me is that I had a mighty need to prance on a dance floor. I've tried partying with 20-somethings and I have nothing against the age group, but they just have a completely different frame of mind and choice of attire when going out. I'm not trying to hear that, see. So, OutPast30 Lady went out by herself! (Insert shocking music here.)

Much to the dismay of my parental units, both biological and adopted, I take to the streets flying solo quite often. It can't and won't be helped. After living in three major metropolitan areas by myself and getting into more than my fair share of trouble, I can safely and intelligently navigate the after-hours scenes without making headline news the next morning. I keep my rape / party whistle handy. I make sure my celly is charged. I always walk with a purpose...as if I know exactly where I'm going. Additionally, I have a developed a pretty impressive "I will kill you without hesitation" facial expression. No one messes with me unless I want to be messed with and I don't put myself in ridiculous situations potentially leading to a knock upside the head. In other words, I'm an adult.

After performing my usual squats and lunges, eating some homemade jambalaya and rocking out to Soca music, I started the night at Lavo's open bar at The Palazzo. I will not elaborate on this particular venue because I plan on visiting it again on Tuesday night. (Be sure to check back on Wednesday for the full report.) After two glasses of wine and a bit of networking, I got myself over to Pure at Ceasar's Palace. I was told to get there at 10:30pm and initially I thought such an early arrival was pure and utter ridiculum. However, lo and behold at 10:30pm, there was a line. I uttered the secret password, gave the ritual handshake and was immediately skipped to the front. (It's so good to be a Las Vegas insider.) I walked through the Pure corridors into the main room. The spot was already starting to get packed. Wow.

If you've ever tortured yourself by watching MTV's The Hills then you've seen the inside of Pure and it is everything a Las Vegas nightclub should be with the scantily clad waitstaff, VIP areas and ultra modern decor. However, I think it's a little larger than most spots and for that I was appreciative. I made a trek to the bathroom. The tiling was nice. I found a vacant highboy to lean against and surveyed the crowd. Absolutely lovely. People of all ages, colors, and persuasions tastefully dressed. Not too skanky. Far from drab. Sure there was a host of chicks wearing those new little dresses with the tapered hem and there were a few who insisted on wearing bras with dresses that bras clearly shouldn't be worn with but I forgave them. There was good energy in the air. People already dancing on the dance floor. Guys smiling. A bride-to-be with her bridal party jerking maniacally to house music. The music changed to a mix of hip-hop and that was it. I snapped a picture with Mike, a young man visiting from California and his friend Charles, a three year resident of LV by way of Boston. I joined them in taking a shot of courage and then hit the dance floor hard.

I made my home there for about an hour and a half. Thank you, stretches, stability ball and morning sprint. My stamina was on FIRE!

While I was on the dance floor, a peculiar thing happened. Yes, I was looking terribly pretty in pink rocking the updated haircut but I didn't expect to get hit on the way I did. She would not tell me her name but she did share that she was married with two kids and was not interested in dancing with men. She smelled like lilac. She looked like she could have been Brazilian or at least some kind of product of South America. Yeah, she was hot and for about half of the time I was on the floor she did everything possible to come between me and my male dance partner including groping, fondling and spanking. Hell. I danced with her until an audience gathered around us on the floor to watch. Men are horrible.

Dear Hot South American Chick who kind of scared me, I had a great time with you. I hope that you made it home safely to your family. Please do not act upon your lesbian impulses unless you first clear it with the spouse or your children are grown.

I left the floor towards the end of the night to go out to the famed Pure balcony. I felt like I was a in a dream-like state and that this couldn't possibly be happening. I was just having a really, really good time. Out on the balcony, I was in awe of the night sky and lights around me. I've got to get back here and party again.

Pure was pure bliss.

Into the Realm of 30-Something...

I first moved to Southern Nevada at the tender age of twenty-four. Come this April 30th, I will boldly step into the realm of 30-somethings as I celebrate my 31st birthday. Vegas is still as it was and how it will always be, a shallow smorgasbord of decadence, temptation, glitter and gossip….but my, how I’ve changed. Sure, I still enjoy the parties and I am still tantalized by the pulsating lure of the Strip. But, I’ve come to see the city with new eyes.

My cravings for jam-packed parties and dancing my day-old heels down to a nub have been replaced by a deep appreciation for fashionable networking events with complimentary booze and butler passes. The most treasured possession in my handbag is my business card holder instead of my lip gloss. Shameless flirtation with the cutest eligible bachelor in the room has taken a backseat to making a worthwhile connection in the world of Las Vegas movers and shakers. And finally, God help me, I have to take a damn nap before pulling an all-nighter.

Perhaps some women, on leaving the conveniently youthful confines of their twenties, may become melancholy. Some of the perkiness is gone. Junior sizes become a thing of the past unless you put yourself on some kind of a coke diet. Suddenly, there’s a random ticking noise alerting your body to procreate if you haven’t already done so.

Hmmm...

Honestly, I can’t complain. I look out over the Las Vegas Valley from the office window of my regular 9 to 5 and I feel like I finally have the right perspective. No, life is not an endless party of celebrity bashes, launch extravaganzas and grand openings…but I have the freedom and the intelligence to partake on occasion. I can appreciate the quiet confines of my Henderson residence just as much as I can delight in a good House of Blues concert or a lively round of Cupid Shuffling at Sam’s Town Live. Whatever I decide, I’ll keep you all posted with all the sordid details.….